New Desperation

Connection is getting worse lately. It feels like it takes forever to load a page! Gosh, I am addicted to Harvest Moon! I know it might sound something like this “lame” but I am really addicted to it recently after Theo sent it to me. *Bryan, you always say it’s lame : ( . Bad you!* Too bad I fail to open Kingdom Hearts!! What a great pity!

I saw Stephen Chow’s new movie, if I am not wrong, the title of the movie is CJ7. In cinema in 7th Feb. I wish someone can go with me. Goin to cinema alone will make me look bad. A girl with desperation.

Today my grandparents just stepped into the plane. They will reach Melbourne by tomorrow morning I guess. My grandpa wanted me to get a driving license. I will be attending classes soon, probably.

There’s a bad news too. I hope dar will not be too upset. Even a person dies; his or her memories will live in us.

Hey, I bumped on Theo. Gosh, you don’t recognize me? How sad~
I was planning to stop by at On On Electrical Store. I miss Creamie. Too bad, I was in a rush.
In airport, I saw JJ. I wanted to call him but it will be a shame to shout in an airport.

Maybe it’s a bit too late for me to post something like 2008’s to-do list. But I hope it can remind myself to get it.
• Pass my driving test *MUST*
• Get a job
• Less in gaming
• Shopping for new clothing and wears
• Get a new pair of spec
• Get some cool color contact lens
• Work harder on drawing and painting
• Try to get violin lessons, it’s kinda impossible
• In a need of notebook and cameras

Stop Breathe

There’s something I found yesterday about myself. I found myself pause from breathing at certain times. Some times I don’t realize it. I think I started to do that since I drop interest in canvas and watercolor painting. I still have not start in it yet.

I designated the VIP logo. I am not sure whether it will be used for the guild logo or not. Probably no. I am not good in editing or designing. To VIP members: VOTE FOR THE BEST! *well I hope you’ll vote for me*

Miracle happens on me please!

Today my mum asked me whether I wanna work or not and of course my answer would me “yes”. It turned out to be a little disappointed when my mum said it’s in Indah and as a clerk if not mistaken. All I have to do is to answer some phone calls, manage company fails and the account. Okay, I am not good in add minus thing. Something does not sound so good is the salary. A beginner with a salary of around RM800 a month. My mum called the woman that recommended the job for me. She went out and her daughter got the phone. She said the boss is away. So, gotta wait him to come back and depend whether the new house can be sold or not. Well, it’s some sort of construction company. I am not so into it but I do need some money. I am living in desperation. Why? Because I left few ringgits of coins left in my piggy bank. I guess I will lose this job without an interview. It does not matter because I still can find other jobs in town perhaps. At least I do not have to get bus ride to Indah every day.

Something terrible happened to me. I have not been drawing for a long time. I found out that I cant draw a thing out. I gotta admit it, I got no talent. Poor thing I am not gifted with it. I don’t even know what field am I good at. I called my friend. I told her that I need my books back because I needed them so much. She told me that she is busy right now and I asked her to call me after her tuition tomorrow. So that I could go to her house and take my books back. And of couse I wanna take them back, they costed me hundreds of ringgit.

My mum wanted me to be pharmacist, teacher or accountant. Look, I am not into that kind of occupation. I promised myself that I would not take science courses in future but I do have some interest in being a vet. It’s my childhood ambition. Unfortunately, I am not good in biology and chemistry. My grandpa asked me if I wanted to go to MARA or not. It’s ridiculous; my answer would be definitely NO. What are they thinking? I don’t want to regret for my whole damn life.

I saw some NS stuff on TV recently. It sucks. I have to climb walls and crash my hand on a piece of wood? What the hell is that?! Damn it. I wish miracle would happen. Cut my name off the list!!

I got frustrated with Perfect World. I had tried every mirror given in that damn web page and still there are always errors! I downloaded uTorrent just for that game. If it’s not Melody who had asked me to play with her, I would not download it because it’s goin to eat my 2GB space! I gave up. I tried to ask my brother help me to buy the installer.

New attempt, I tried the best I can in drawing using a mouse. I am definitely not good in it but I am in a great desperation that I would be a little bit of “perfect” in it. My hand shakes, so the lines are not smooth. I tried to color it and in the end the result is not so good. Maybe people should call it as “teruk”?
I made some mistake in CG-ing the eyes. I knew the eyes are a bit creepy but I cant do anything. I am not good in both drawing and CGs. Here I post it. It’s terrible. *You don’t have to tell me how terrible it is*

It’s a new year. The school had started. I don’t have to go to school or work. I need to find a job soon because I don’t have any pocket money from my parents. Hmmn I wonder when I will be going to take a driving license test. *REMINDER: Bryan, you have not tell me yet the sifu~!*

I wanna go out but I have some problem. No transport and no money. Hate it, this world is so realistic, almost everything is about money! I wish I can work together with Jac but the working place is quite far from my house. *Stop complaining!*

My grandparents will be going back to Australia soon. I am still wondering which college or university I will be going in future. I wanted to go KL but my grandparents and uncles that are staying in Australia wish I could persuade my study in Melbourne. So that I can live with them and take care of my grandparents perhaps. In my mind, going to Australia might be fun for others but maybe not for me. I don’t have such a high ranked English and I cant really speak fluently too.

Before that, I have to attend the National Service. I don’t wish for it and yet, God wanted me to join it. Maybe I lack of confidence, strength and so on, so that He put me in the army stuff? There’s only one word I can describe it, “catastrophe”. I am not an outdoor person, I am passive. Suddenly, I have to do the marching thing, wall climbing and so whatever tough stamina stuff, surely I will be exhausted. *Faint* Moreover, I am still worrying bout some personal hygiene part of mine in the army camp. For example, how am I going to bath? Or problems that I will encounter during my period?

Gosh, not really want to think bout it. It is terrible enough for me. I must take some nice time to relax while I can now, if not I will be way too tired in the idiot camp.